"You are ALWAYS good enough"—lessons learned from applying to college in a pandemic
By Marley Comito
May 1, 2021, is a date that has loomed over me ever since my sophomore year when I initially discovered how significant the first day of the month of May was for high school seniors. For those of you that think of it as just another spring day, May 1st marks National College Decision Day, the day that high school seniors commit to a college.
Back in August, I remember feeling overwhelmed, timid, and anxious to begin the notorious college admissions process. When I picture the position I was in last summer, I remember wanting to learn everything and more about college admissions. The ins, the outs, the things that no one actually tells you but if you dig deep enough you can find—everything. I became fascinated with what I was getting myself into and made it my goal to come out of it assured I had done everything humanly possible to present myself as a successful applicant to my selected schools. I knew what I was looking for in a college from day one. Warm weather, great opportunities for my major (journalism), and somewhere I barely knew anyone else who was going. I had my priorities set and knew I would make my dreams a reality.
“I had my priorities set and knew I would make my dreams a reality. ”
I remember working hard to study for my SATs and desperately refreshing my email waiting to see if the College Board was canceling yet another month of standardized tests due to COVID-19 precautions. By the end of the fall, I had signed up for six different scheduled and professionally proctored SAT exams, all of which were canceled in Minnesota. As each university nation-wide announced that they had decided to go “Test-Optional” (meaning that for the first time ever, SAT and ACT scores were not being required by their undergraduate admission applications), I could feel mini weights being lifted off my chest, since I still didn’t have an SAT score to submit. Something unique I can say as a 2021 high school senior is that I really will graduate high school and go on to attend an amazing academic institution without ever taking a standardized test in my life. Woohoo!
Without an ACT/SAT score, I figured my chances of getting accepted into “prestigious” and higher-ranked universities would be so much higher than I originally thought with only my GPA, essays, teacher recommendation letters, and many extracurricular activities now being considered in my application. However, something I never quite thought to consider was that every single other high school senior was thinking that exact same thing. Once the November and December application deadlines passed and colleges were able to begin counting and releasing some statistics about the class of 2021’s applications, a huge wave of confusion and disbelief hit social media. Top universities across the country were stating that they had received as many as three times the amount of applications this year, and that because of the dramatic increases, acceptance rates were to be lowered drastically. Even though more kids than ever were applying, it’s not like the schools were getting any bigger, and the number of “admitted students” allowed was required to stay the same per school.
I knew that this process was going to look different than any previous application-cycle year for my grade once the term “test-optional” became normalized, but I had always thought of this concept as a good thing (no SATs, yay!), not a horrible one (harder chance than ever before to get into college, nooo!). Regardless, I still had the motivation to do everything in my power to help my application stand out. Because college campuses were closed for prospective tours, “virtual tours” were introduced via Zoom, and I can’t even count how many of those I sat through all throughout the fall, hoping that if my name appeared enough times as “Attended”, my application file would be updated with “has demonstrated interest” in the schools I was praying to get into.
“My application was unique, passionate, and charismatic—how could I not beat the odds that were against me when I had so much to offer?”
I never felt too scared by the intimidating statistics, like how UCLA received close to 150,000 applications. I knew deep down that I had done everything I could have, and the rest was up to G-d (and these admissions officers). I also somehow slept better at night thinking to myself that I’m different than those hundreds of thousands of other kids. My application was unique, passionate, and charismatic—how could I not beat the odds that were against me when I had so much to offer?
After many acceptances (which were amazing), I was humbled by my first rejection letter, UCLA. It was my second choice school, and I was crushed. So many feelings of self-doubt consumed me. “How was my application not enough?”, “what makes the ones who were accepted so much better than me?”, “why wasn’t I good enough for them?”. Then once my dream school (USC) rejected me after 10 virtual tours and information calls, a 1v1 Zoom meeting with my admissions representative, a handwritten letter from them thanking me for showing interest in their sessions, and extra supplemental essays and scholarship applications, I had the answers to my questions, and I knew I wasn’t the problem.
The reality is that the college admissions process is a game, a lottery. Some of my wisest friends with 4.0 GPAs and 36 ACTs were still rejected from great schools. There is no such thing as the “ideal applicant.” The “perfect” person I had worked so hard to turn myself into on paper for these colleges simply did not exist, and I have learned to accept that. There are thousands of incredible universities across the country, the problem is that the majority of students all want to get into the same few.
“I am good enough, and the determination I showed in my applications is only a reflection of my character, not a failed effort because of a rejection letter. ”
As I now sit at the other end of the process, I never expected my decision to be between two schools I never pictured myself attending, since I had been too busy spending the year romanticizing the idea of myself at school in LA. I’ve learned many lessons this year, like: if you/your family can’t afford a school you should not go into crippling debt to go there, friends can become extremely competitive and less supportive when it comes to college admissions, and often a “brand name” school is more about ego than about education.
If I could go back to August, I would tell myself to be more open-minded. The world is full of endless possibilities—how can I, a seventeen-year-old, possibly know what the universe has planned for me? I am good enough, and the determination I showed in my applications is only a reflection of my character, not a failed effort because of a rejection letter. My drive and passion will go with me wherever I choose to spend the next four years of my life, and hopefully after then too.
Even though I happened to apply to college during this challenging time, I still received some amazing acceptances and had incredible options to choose from and celebrate, for which I am so grateful. To anyone who is yet to experience this process or knows someone who will, please remind yourself (or them) that you/they are ALWAYS good enough. No admissions decision will ever be the judge of that, and our success is up to us, not the stamp of the university on a diploma.
P.S. My decision came down to the University of Michigan and the University of Wisconsin-Madison. I chose Madison. Go Badgers!
To read more of Marley’s incredible, wise writing for us, click here. Learn more about her time in Israel with the Muss program and more! Also, be sure to check out her podcast on TCJewfolk, Spill the Soup!